Now, despite her wrinkles and middle-age spread, she "dates" a multitude of guys. "We don't go places together; they sometimes buy lunch but just as often they don't. Actually, that's a euphemism; we have sex." With a lover whose bad back has him on the injured reserve list, Anna knows what to do: click on "Casual Encounters" and start the e-mail banter that almost always leads to a meeting.
At age 28, she moved in with the first man who looked her way.Sometimes we just coordinated the logistics of the hookup, but equally often, we wrote and received profoundly intimate and revealing letters -- an epistolary of erotic stories.Then there is the issue of sexual chemistry, which is arbitrary, inexplicable and largely unpredictable.Our adventures have included the hot, the not-so-hot, and some potential hook-ups that never even got off the ground.There were memorable ones, like Lily's first date, which ended at a.m. Or the ex-con who went down on Anna for an hour straight.There were forgettable ones too, like the alcoholic art dealer, or the guy who excused himself in the middle of sex to smoke a cigarette.And there have been multiple-partner dates, which involved average-looking East Bay residents who swing, tie up, dominate, submit, and spank. Some of the lovemaking was wonderful, a lot of it was initially awkward but got better as time went on, and some of it was downright disastrous.The two of us met when Anna answered an ad that Lily's then-boyfriend, Scott, posted on Craigslist.Lily and Scott were seeking a third partner to join a menage a trois.Lily told her close friends about how thoroughly she would be sleeping around, joking, "I want my vagina to have call-waiting." Now she is enjoying the adolescence she never had, dating like an oversexed high school student but armed with the wisdom and savvy of a woman in her 40s.Anna decided to try Craigslist because she found other online dating sites too silly.